


Things Change and Stay the Same

by FishingforCrows



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Cute, Everyone Is Gay, Except Wensleydale lol, Fluff, Teenagers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-15
Updated: 2019-07-15
Packaged: 2020-06-29 01:45:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 782
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19819990
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FishingforCrows/pseuds/FishingforCrows
Summary: The Them have grown up and yet not much has changed about them. At least, not the things that count.Adam, Pepper, Brian, and Wensleydale discuss their identities and orientations in Hogback Wood.A very short mini-fic that popped into my mind.





	Things Change and Stay the Same

“So, am I the only heterosexual left in this group?” Wensleydale asked blinking at Brian owlishly.

The Them were sitting in their quarry in Hogback Wood as they had done for many years before now and probably would for at least a few more years to come. So much had changed since they had first discovered this spot in primary school, and yet it seemed even more had stayed the same.

They were older now, bigger too, fully fledged teenagers. Pepper, the youngest of them by a few months was approaching her fifteenth birthday this fall. Their games had grown up as well. Rather than running around the woods pretending to burn witches, they now ran around the woods trying to be witches. Or occultists, as their mentor liked to specify. They’d taken a particular interest in ghost hunting that summer, after Adam had purchased a Ouija board from the internet.

Despite all that, the Them were still fundamentally the same. Adam was still their leader, Pepper was still their fierce right hand, Brian still supplied the morale for the group, Wensleydale was still their resident source of logic, and they were still considered a nusaince by most of the adult residents of Tadfield.

In the minutes before Wensleydale had asked his question the topic of discussion had turned to a new teacher at their school that the majority of their grade seemed to have a crush on.

Pepper had complained that he wasn’t even that attractive. Adam pointed out she didn’t find any man attractive. Pepper sniffed haughtily and said that even so, she was sick and tired of all the girl’s at lunch interrogating her over what he was like just because she had class with him. Adam said thoughtfully that they agreed with the girls that the teacher was quite attractive, but that it was stupid to moon over him because he would obviously never date a student in a million years so they were all kidding themselves. That was when Brian chimed in. He commented that he didn’t understand the hype over this teacher, but that he didn’t understand the hype over anyone for being ‘attractive’. He then admitted that he had begun to think he was asexual.

“Well... yeah that’s true then,” Brian replied to Wensleydale after a moment of comtemplation.

“Wouldn’t Adam be considered heterosexual?” Pepper chimed in.

“No m’not!” Adam replied indignantly.

“Yes, you are,” Pepper insisted. “If you date a boy or a girl, either way they’re a different gender than you,”

“But what if they date another nonbinary person?” Brian countered with a smile, always ready to jump in for support. “Then that’d be homosexual wouldn’t it?”

Adam grinned triumphantly at Pepper.

“There’s nothing wrong with being heterosexual,” Wensleydale muttered defensively. “And anyway, since Adam is attracted to men, women, and nonbinary people, that would make them pansexual. Not heterosexual,” He added matter-of-factly.

“You don’t get to decide what I am,” Adam corrected him sharply and Wensleydale’s lips clamped tightly together, looking embarrassed. “But what’s that mean anyway? Pansexual?”

“Pan? Like that god that witches worship?” Brian asked, a memory alighting behind his eyes of something they had discussed long ago when Anathema first came to town.

“Well yes and no,” Wensleydale explained. “Pan is also a Greek word for ‘all’ so pansexual means attracted to all genders.”

“Sounds about right,” Adam said with a decisive nod.

“Isn’t that just bisexual?” Pepper asked skeptically. “My mom has a book called the Bisexual Manifesto and it says bisexual people can love all genders,”

“No, there are differences. I’m not quite certain of them though...” Wensleydale muttered as he tried to think back to what he’d read on the internet about these different words.

Quiet fell over the Them for a moment as they seemed to all be trying to work out what they thought of all the new information that had been brought before them in the last few minutes. “I like pansexual,” Adam said, breaking the silence with their definitive tone. “It sounds more like me. I like Greek mythology, anyway,” They added with a smirk and a twinkle in their eye. They jumped down from their seat in the tree they had been lounging in.

Dog, who had spent this whole conversation voraciously chewing on a stick, jumped up and began running circles around their ankles, tail wagging. Then they walked towards Brian, giving him a pat on the shoulder. “So now that that’s sorted then,” They said, looking at the other two expectantly. “Let’s go get some food,”

With that, the Them began to wander out of Hogback Wood, possessing new words and the same attitudes, happy as they ever were.


End file.
